When the Levees Broke

Dear God… it’s Dave. Well, it’s been a little over a year since You sent Hurricane Katrina down here to kick our ass. Thanks for that one, by the way. You at least gave Noah enough notice to build an arc. But the poor people of New Orleans… well, I digress. The natural disaster and national humiliation known as Hurricane Katrina is brilliantly documented in Spike Lee’s film “When the Levees Broke: A Requiem in Four Acts” now airing on HBO. If You happen to get some free time (I know Pat Robertson probably nags you night and day), check it out.

Revisiting Hurricane Katrina was upsetting, not only because of the death and destruction caused by one of the worst natural disasters ever to smite the United States, but also because I was reminded of how badly Your boy President Bush dropped the ball. I mean, he really screwed the pooch on this one. The effects of the federal government’s failure to react in a timely fashion is still being felt by the citizens of New Orleans and other gulf states. Perhaps the government would’ve reacted faster if New Orleans was a city filled with the rich and elite, otherwise known as Bush’s base. Perhaps the government could’ve reacted faster had there been more National Guardsmen on American soil as opposed to fighting insurgents in Iraq. Perhaps FEMA would’ve reacted faster had it not been headed up by a Bush crony who was grossly unqualified to do the job. Or perhaps Bush didn’t evacuate the poor people of New Orleans too quickly because he looked upon that as a “cut and run” strategy. And we all know how much he hates those.

The beauty of “When the Levees Broke” is that the people of New Orleans are the storytellers. From everyday citizens, to reporters, to politicians, every voice is given a chance to talk about how Katrina affected them and how they felt about the way it was handled. The film also takes the time to deal with all the different factors that led to this American tragedy: poorly constructed and maintained levees (thank you Army Corps of Engineers), global warming (thank you fossil fuels), and the aforementioned horrific response by FEMA and the federal government (thank you again George W. and other incompetent beurocrats). The film also deals with the forces that have hindered and continue to hinder the reconstruction of the Big Easy. Again, FEMA finds itself at the top of the list, failing to provide money and shelter for Katrina victims in a timely fashion as well as being tardy in its efforts to clean up debris. The insurance companies seem to be finding any excuse they can to not pay claims, leaving many without the resources to rebuild. And one of the most interesting revelations in the film is that for years the oil companies that drill off Louisiana’s coast are allowed to do so without paying a penny in taxes to the state. But, of course, the federal government gets its share. And as a local radio personality explains in the film, if the state had the tax revenue from the oil and gas industries they’d have the funds needed to rebuild the levees as well as the rest of New Orleans.

God, You’re probably wondering why I’m bringing this film to Your attention. Well, the last time I checked we were one nation under You. And if our government doesn’t get its head out of its ass soon, we’re going to be one crappy nation under You. Hurricane Katrina and Spike Lee’s film about the disaster illustrate what a poor job our government does in taking care of its own people. And since President Bush claims to be a God fearing Christian… well, I’m sure there’s something You could say to him that would make him get his shit together. Because if our country doesn’t make some changes, and America falls victim to another terrorist attack or natural disaster… I think it’s safe to say we’re all screwed.

Your Buddy,

Dave

I Need a Miracle

Dear God… it’s Dave. I need a miracle. A member of my family is at death’s door. You know who I’m talking about… my beloved Sony Playstation. A few years ago my wife gave me the Playstation for my birthday. It was a very welcome addition to our family. I’ve enjoyed hours and hours of quality time with the gaming system which I’ve used to play various sports and Star Wars themed games.
But a few months ago something went very wrong. The Playstation didn’t seem to be itself. It started freezing during games and has gotten to the point where I can’t even get it to start up properly. You can imagine how heartbreaking this is for me. Ever since, I’ve found myself at a loss for what to do with my free time. I’ve been reading more and, as you know, I’ve started blogging. If this continues, I might even find myself learning a second language. We can’t have that.

Unfortunately, the plight of my Playstation is part of a growing problem. More and more often it seems that just about every piece of electronic technology my wife and I buy ends up breaking about two to three years after purchase. You know, right after all the warrantees expire. Cell phones, fans, DVD players, VCRs… you name it. We buy it, two years later, it’s broken and we need to replace it. The only piece of electronic equipment that seems to last forever is our alarm clock. But how hard can those be to make? I mean, the Swiss are good at making clocks.

I suppose this is all just part of the consumer driven society we live in. If companies made products that lasted a significant amount of time, then we wouldn’t need to buy new products every two years and they’d make less money. God forbid. I understand that’s the way things are, but that doesn’t make me want to kick the manufacturers of these items in the crotch any less. Seriously, put one of these guys in front of me right now and I’d stretch out my right leg for twenty minutes before I kicked him. Just to make sure I landed the most powerful kick possible.

I can’t change the way of the world, but I can ask my Maker for a favor. God, You are all powerful. You are capable of miraculous intervention. You are so magnificent that we must capitalize any word that refers to You. That’s why I’m asking You to resurrect my Playstation the way Jesus resurrected Lazarus. The rebirth of my gaming system won’t have the same kind of worldwide historical significance, but it sure would make me happy, not to mention save me the two hundred bucks it would cost me to buy a new one.

You’re very busy, so I don’t expect You to attend to this right away, but the sooner the better. In a few months, my first child will arrive and I’m going to need a way to zone out. I’m going to need something to deliver me from my wife’s postpartum depression and my son’s constant crying. I’m confident a healthy Playstation would be able to do that.

So see what you can do. I might even be willing to say a Rosary or something.

Your buddy,

Dave

PS – Also, let me know if Madden 2007 is significantly better that Madden 2006. Because I’m not going to spend fifty-bucks if it’s essentially the same game.